I look at you and my heart goes back to everything.
Late nights, the covers drawn. Kisses that weren’t meant to be and situations that should have never happened. And of course, the alcohol that came along with it.
It should have been nothing. Nothing at all.
It didn’t even last enough to count. It lasted the length of an old song, and then we stopped. But my heart stayed there… just like that.
No fireworks, no cosmic timing. Nothing to say that it was one for the books. It was just the quiet way you held me and the unassuming potential of maybes and what ifs.
You touched my heart, unintentionally.
It should have meant nothing. Nothing at all.
May 15, 2012
No matter how much I try, I still can’t understand.
I still have no words.
Maybe in a couple of days.
I have written so many things about you that it’s hard to find new words for old feelings.
I love you. And you, me.
I don’t know how to deal with that just yet.
With lack of a better title, I’m back.
I missed this.
Guess this isn’t the only thing that’s back (I started writing again, go figure). More on that when I’m coherent enough to formulate something sane.
How can you put into words what you barely understand? And, how can words be possibly enough?
So here I am again, trying.
Maybe what you’ll find here can help with whatever you’re going through. Maybe it can give you answers, one way or another. Maybe it’ll give you clarity. Maybe it will make a difference. Maybe, maybe.
So here I am, trying. To find my way, to find that something that’s missing… just like all of you.
Ready? Brace yourself.